Damn Dirty Apes

Donna Matias points to a horrible story involving an elderly couple who decided to host a birthday party for a 39-year-old chimp, Moe, who they had raised as their own child.

They taught him to wear clothes, to take showers, to use the toilet, and to watch television in their West Covina, Calif., home...

The Davises were visiting Moe at an animal sanctuary in the hills of eastern Kern County -- a place to which he had been banished after biting a woman -- when they were attacked by two other chimps and brutally mauled.

St. James Davis took the brunt of the attack, the ferocity of which left paramedics stunned. ''I had no idea a chimpanzee was capable of doing that to a human," said Kern County Fire Captain Curt Merrell, who was on the scene.

Davis, who remained in critical condition Friday, was badly disfigured. According to his wife, he lost all the fingers from both hands, an eye, part of his nose, cheek and lips, and part of his buttocks. His foot was mutilated and his heel bone was cracked.

LaDonna, 61, said she was sitting at a table with her husband, getting ready to cut the chimp's birthday cake, when she saw the two other chimps out of the corner of her eye. Moe, according to other accounts, was still in his cage...

Male chimps usually stand about 4 feet tall and weigh between 90 and 120 pounds, specialists say. They are strong and aggressive animals who routinely kill and devour much larger animals in the wild. Their upper body strength is said to be five to 10 times that of the average human...

Ape specialist Deborah Fouts, director of the Chimp and Human Communication Institute at Central Washington University, said the attack may have been prompted by jealousy.

''Chimpanzees have a real sense of right and wrong and fairness and unfairness," said Fouts, a veteran of four decades of work with chimps. ''It sounds like people were showering a lot of attention on Moe, birthday cake and the like. . . . Perhaps the other chimps were jealous of Moe."

Even though chimps have a sense of right and wrong, Donna warns that

this story exemplifies the danger in assuming that because these animals seem to feel and think like us, and possibly because they are so damn cute like (some of) us they will respect our codes of morality and civility. No, no, no, people! Listen now or listen later: animals are not people, too. They lack free will. They lack impulse control.

Justice as fairness, indeed. I wonder what Rawls would think?

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Notes from blogland... 1) At Cafe Hayek, Don Boudreaux praises Steve Landsburg for pointing out the bigotry inherent in protectionism....

I want to know who the

I want to know who the fucking moron was that let them in there with two strange chimps.

Imagine the damage they

Imagine the damage they could do with a few frozen fish...

One could argue that the two

One could argue that the two violent chimps were actually libertarians, attacking the humans for being nanny-staters who kept their family members in cages except on birthdays and holidays.

When I read the article, it sounded like the chimps were stir crazy from being locked up their whole lives. Aparently there were some females in a cage nearby, tantalizingly close but unreachable day after day, just rubbing in their captivity.

When two humans started sitting down with one of their own, serving him a nice cake to lull him into submission, the chimps decided to eliminate the brainwashers.

I thought the removal of the testicles was understandible as strategy. "The humans have all the weapons -- the only way we can end this horror is to stop them from breeding."

Examples like this are

Examples like this are useful.  They prove that when we say that certain people who are violent or act with little regard for proportionality are "acting like animals", it's not just a turn of phrase.

All the same, what's this

All the same, what's this garbage about animals lacking free will? And they certainly don't lack impulse control, as multiple experiments have demonstrated their capacity for spannungsbogen.

That monkey looks like my

That monkey looks like my girlfriend first thing in the morning.

Interesting. The article I

Interesting. The article I read stated that not only did this man lose his foot alltogether, but his testicles were torn off as well.

Either this is a different, recent chimp-mauling case, or newspapers are being unnecessarily delicate in their reporting.

i saw a chimp at the zoo,

i saw a chimp at the zoo, turning a tractor tyre inside out and back again. i wouldn't want fingers that strong anywhere near my testicles..

if these chimps are able to

if these chimps are able to conquer two humans, e should at least give them the right to vote.

PETA President

yall nougatz a trip yo fo

yall nougatz a trip yo fo real i swear but dat monkey iz sexy though so keep doin ya thing na mean

I hope the man in cali

I hope the man in cali (califonia)is alright i hope that animal control deals with it and beheads thatfurious chimp keep there lipssealed.