Technical Virgin

Social conservatives are always talking about how abstinence is the only way to avoid unwanted pregnancies. But with their raging hormones, abstinence for most teens leaves much to be desired.

Thankfully, the good people at TechnicalVirgin.com offer a number of creative alternatives to procreative sex.

[T]here is a way for youths to enjoy rich and satisfying sexual intimacy without risking unwanted pregnancy ? ANAL SEX! ...

Of course, the safest way for teens to avoid unwanted pregnancy while satisfying their carnal needs is to limit themselves to homoerotic encounters until they are ready for procreation. But many boys and girls are uncomfortable with the idea of same-sex encounters. Anal sex, however, can be fun for both sexes, and thanks to modern improvements in strap-on sex tools, girls can enjoy being in control of their own anal encounters.

This solution may not work for everyone, but TechnicalVirgin isn't worried - they've really thought of everything:

Mark G.

MARK G., Atomic City, ID

When I started my junior year of high school, I was already the captain of the football team and the baseball team, I was a straight-A honors student, and girls were offering themselves to me. I just couldn't say no to easy sex and free booze, but I knew I was risking my future. So I prayed on it, drove to Boise, and got this butt-ugly haircut. I haven't been laid since, praise Jesus!

Danielle V.DANIELLE V., Buffalo, N.Y.

My boyfriend always asks to have sex. "Come on, baby," he begs me, all the time. I feel really bad about making him wait, but I know that if I have sex with him too soon, he won't respect me. But I also know that if he ain't satisfied with me, he'll date some other girl. So once a month I show him how much I really love him by coughing up the $500 to get him a really top-quality call girl to fuck him silly.

And be sure to watch the helpful TV Commercials.

[cross-posted at The Agitator]

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You might laugh, but this

You might laugh, but this practice is more common than a lot of people realize in Moslem countries (especially in north Africa), where technical virginity is pretty much a requirement for marriage.

And how do you think "Greek" sex got to have that name?

Micha, Perhaps I'll think of

Micha,

Perhaps I'll think of something to say after I find my jaw [it fell to the floor] and pick it up. :)